i want to talk about you.

i want to let you know how my life runs, and how it runs away from me every day, so you could understand me.

i want to know who and how you are, why you are. i want to know your secrets, your shallow parts, the smallest things you laugh at or get mad at. i want to see your weaknesses because you've been putting up too much of your strengths for a very long time, and i want to look through the cracks in it. i'm sure you have em.

i want to learn, and know, and be reminded, of how you care about me, how you are interested in who i am, in me. (but, of course, that's all just wishful thinking.)

i wish i could instantly know about these things. a simple yes or no is so so so much better than nothing at all. but... i have no right to demand of these things from you. i have no right to demand answers from you. i am nothing to you, at all.