Hello baby... i miss you already...
I will never forget what i saw when we got home. Your eyes were empty. I knew you weren't playing... but omg was i wishing i could still save you.
I love you, my heart.
I'm sorry that i couldn't take you in no matter how much you wanted in.
I feel like such a failure because i couldn't take care of you enough.
I'm so sorry... so fucking sorry... please just remember, if you can, that i love you so much...
I'm going to miss your sweet little greetings whenever i come home. The cute stretches. The bonks on my legs. Waiting for the door to open so you could sneak in. Watching us eat dinner. That super sweet demeanor. You were the sweetest cat i have ever come across. And such curiosity.
I love you so much.
I don't imagine you growing kitty wings haha. Just floating upwards while still looking at us. But it makes me cry more when i remember that i cannot get you back...
I felt angry earlier when i saw your body. I wanted to confront whoever did this to you. It hurts that i couldn't do anything at that moment. I think you might have been hit by a vehicle, but i have no proof.
It was different holding your lifeless body. It wasn't cold, but not warm either. I meowed at you twice, imagining you would answer back, forgetting you can't anymore. Your blood was pooling at the lower part of your laid body. That part was warm, but uncomfortably so... like holding a blood bag. You were getting a tiny bit stiff too, i felt it.
Im still hoping you'll suddenly wake up and come back...
But enough of the senselessness...
I love you, and that's never going to change...