Lucky people do not have the time to think a out a lot of things. Their hours are occupied by the love of their lives: family, friends, work, money, fun, learning.
People who have too much time think about too many things. So they try to preoccupy themselves with other things like temporary work and play. But night time is the enemy of thinkers, in the same way that it is their loyal companion. When a person with too much time is not preoccupied with something self induced, he thinks. About a lot of things. Good and bad things. Imagining scenarios and words. Imagining the future and its dreary implications (which if they didn't think about too much, would still come about anyway, but not as harsh as they think it would be).
I imagine a lot. I especially imagine quiet or fun or sweet moments with you. I imagine being "us". How it would be and how nice it would be. But at the same time, my imagination highlights my inability to fully communicate. Even in my head, i still can't carry conversations. I can write long stuff like this blog and my other blogs, but i can't seem to be a good talker. Talking drives me to my panic zone. It enhances my observation skills more, but again, further highlights my lack of talking skills.
I personally have no problems with it. I'm not a talker, and i don't exactly need to talk everyday. But i can feel the burden of it with situations like this, when i want to get to know someone better, or when i suddenly meet a random acquaintance. Awkwardness is never nice unless it's an accepted trait, by someone who knows who and how you are.
For now, i will continue to dream of you, dream of the us that jumped through all the ensuing awkwardness. Dream of how sweet we can be, how supportive of each other, how compatible we are. But i should also keep in mind, that these are all just dreams, even the you in my dream is a dream, nothing more...
People who have too much time think about too many things. So they try to preoccupy themselves with other things like temporary work and play. But night time is the enemy of thinkers, in the same way that it is their loyal companion. When a person with too much time is not preoccupied with something self induced, he thinks. About a lot of things. Good and bad things. Imagining scenarios and words. Imagining the future and its dreary implications (which if they didn't think about too much, would still come about anyway, but not as harsh as they think it would be).
I imagine a lot. I especially imagine quiet or fun or sweet moments with you. I imagine being "us". How it would be and how nice it would be. But at the same time, my imagination highlights my inability to fully communicate. Even in my head, i still can't carry conversations. I can write long stuff like this blog and my other blogs, but i can't seem to be a good talker. Talking drives me to my panic zone. It enhances my observation skills more, but again, further highlights my lack of talking skills.
I personally have no problems with it. I'm not a talker, and i don't exactly need to talk everyday. But i can feel the burden of it with situations like this, when i want to get to know someone better, or when i suddenly meet a random acquaintance. Awkwardness is never nice unless it's an accepted trait, by someone who knows who and how you are.
For now, i will continue to dream of you, dream of the us that jumped through all the ensuing awkwardness. Dream of how sweet we can be, how supportive of each other, how compatible we are. But i should also keep in mind, that these are all just dreams, even the you in my dream is a dream, nothing more...
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