I don't know why i keep hoping for a better turn of events... a better outcome... a happier one...
I don't know why i'm never good enough... i do know that i'm not at all outgoing, and i can be walled up too much... but why isn't anyone even trying...?
It's not just a thing of not having a boyfriend, a companion, someone who would adore you and care for you... it's a show, either just between the 2 of you or for the whole world, that you have someone who accepts you completely, wants to get to know you more, wants to take responsibility for you because you're just that precious to him... i dunno. It's just starting to feel like i don't deserve that kind of love and acceptance.